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We learned a lot from them and they are the ones who found our second swinging experience with another couple. That is a story for another time. Bed time everyone Natalie.

It sounds like you and your husband are well matched in personalities, so you are both willing to cede to the other if the other does something better.

Your rules make sense and are quite logical. You may have said it in another post, but I don't remember: did either you or you husband have other sexual partners before meeting?

I ask because your husband asked what it was like during penetration for your first out of marriage sexual encounter after getting married.

I would think if you had had a lot of partners, it may have been hard to describe in fine detail. I can actually remember the details of giving oral more than I can having intercourse for the most part.

I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience. Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction?

Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia Register! Comment Post Cancel. Originally posted by jns View Post.

Well that's another great story again Natalie, with husband with your swinging life style. That's how you been able to be involved in the life style for so long with these rules you set forth.

Before jumping in head first with thinking of the ramification of living this life style that's really good for you. But my only question if you could do it all over again.

Would you do anything differently at all Natalie, on living in the swinging life style. When out driving always turn left. Then, should you become lost, you can find your way home by reversing the procedure and always turning right.

Originally posted by Natalie View Post. Yes, I had several partners before getting married. My husband was interested in the sex details of this specific time because this was the first time I'd been with another man since we married which gave him quite a sexual high thinking about it.

Interestingly enough, he never really asked about the men except in general terms that I'd had sex with before we met. He seems only interested in the men I've been with as a married women.

Even today my husband gets very excited when I tell him or write it out for him the details of my intimate encounters.

For instance, last night I had my th sexual encounter with a new man. My husband has been gone for a few days on a business trip to Dallas and he knows I hate to sleep alone.

One or two nights is fine but more than that I get very nervous and scared to be alone. I' a fully independent woman but I feel protected when a man sleeps next to me.

As usual when he knows he will be gone for several days like this he suggested I find a "bed mate" for a night or two.

Well instead of calling a friend to come over I happened to meet this young, well educated man who was visiting my company from overseas for some training he's an engineer like my husband.

I never intended to "hook up" with him but to make a long story short it worked out perfectly and I was able to have a man in my bed last night and I slept very soundly.

My husband is due back any minute and I of course am going to have to tell him every dirty detail of what happened last night.

He never ever gets tired of hearing about my exploiting these "poor young men. Originally posted by Motorguy View Post. I'd be a little bit more careful on the couples we have chosen but other than that I'd change nothing.

We've had a few nut cases. Is this going to be a series Natalie - how you got from point a to z type thing?

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Wizard's Ball Savannah, GA. Sat, Nov 13, PM. Sat, Oct 31, AM. My questions are, what if we get there and he wants to explore with other people?

So, did you attend? My husband and I have attended venues and meet potential FWB. We did alot of very real discussions about comfort levels and what we expected of eachother.

Open communication is paramount. There are some events that allow sex acts there on site, others are off site.

That is the least pressured environment to step into swingdom. Just something to consider for evening the playing field. Swingers come in all sizes, shapes, ages, and colors.

Guys have a harder time getting laid than we do. This is a fact. Sex sites and porn are nearly always geared toward men. Dig deep and bring out that inner vixen.

Make him trip on his tongue when you step in the room! Ever considered a pole at home? The results are amazing! I workout a few times a week, 3 song minimum.

It makes me feel SO sexy. It comes in handy at events…usually a pole somewhere. Never nervous about walking in heels, because you workout in them.

Biggest reward is seeing your man wide eyed and hard. Sex with another woman? I allowed my husband to enjoy another woman with me in the same bed.

It was a learning experience for both of us. A first for me, and I felt a little awkward… initially. We are committed to each other and deeply in love, married 11 yrs before the threesome.

Was it getting old? Our personal approach is that there is balance. If one does —, the other is allowed the same.

Make sure you BOTH are happy with ground rules. Take care, Pepper. Pepper, thank u so much for sharing your valuable insights and experiences. Can you go into further detail about how the first threesome with you husband and the other woman went down?

Did he take turns doing both of you? Sorry, I know this is probably too personal for you to actually answer, but I am strongly considering making a similar scenario happen between my husband and I and another woman.

I would love some more input and advice from you on this topic. U say u were married 11 years— so am i safe in assuming that u had no insecurities..?

I have a question but am unsure as to whom I should ask. I am currently dating a lady who says she wants a monogamous relationship unless we were both involved which tell me she may have some swinging tendencies.

On one hand it could certainly open up some exciting opportunities. I know it sounds silly to some, even to me at times. I am very attracted to a variety of females.

I even flirt from time to time. So I know its a normal thing to interact with others like this. However, given my very strict ideology on the many facets of sex I was raised with.

I find it difficult to overcome that mindset. Can someone help me? Give me some sort of guidance on how to proceed and retain the closeness I have felt and want to continue feeling with this girl?

Hi, I was wondering if you have any stats or know where I can find statistics on couples breaking up after they become swingers? Im with Mike on this I do the same things flirting with guys and being hurt in my past.

So this lifestyle is a bit iffy to me, I cant even imagine my bf having sex with another woman. He asked me about having a threesome and swinging but im not sure i can handle that.

To Thomas Interesting question and I have heard that there are studies but they are all over the place. From my experience this makes sense.

I have been swinging many years so here are my observations. I see a lot of couples get into swinging as a last ditch effort to save a marriage, it just does not work and if you had a study that had a large proportion of those types of people then it would show a higher divorce rate.

They are usually very new to swinging and do not stay in it for more than 6 months and they are gone. The ones who have been at it longer than say a year also seem to have more stable marriages.

Most of our friends have been together for 10 plus years and many are like us who are approaching 25 years.

If you were to sample this group I think you would see a greatly reduced divorce rate.

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And I mean, doing something like this, I'm not going to go to work and say, guess what I did this weekend. But there's no shame. They're into soft swapping.

Which means everything but full intercourse. Guys with their favorite car. You let someone else drive it.

You can drive the car. But that's my car. That's a good analogy. Both couples are part of a dramatic shift in attitudes about what it means to be in a committed relationship.

And apps like tinder and ok cupid make finding exactly what you're looking for, whether you're single or a couple, easier than ever.

This is swing school. And swing school is how we welcome beginners into the lifestyle. Before the party starts, rules are laid out. Single women or couples are allowed, but no men flying solo.

The price of admission? It's all perfectly legal. Everyone is a consenting adult. And every one, they say, practicing safe sex.

And these conditioned swingers share advice with our couples. Jealousy is not an issue. Because if there is, the Li lifestyle is not for you. If you are jealous, then you have that fear you're going to lose someone.

And I think individually, we're the best we're going to get. As night falls, the room gets darker. The mood, sexier. Mike and Sarah have now scoped out the room.

There's an asian woman here that Sarah was looking at and I kind of agreed to, also. We got the girls together finally and we're going to take this to the next step, I believe.

They start to get frisky, kissing each other, hoping to get things started. It quickly gets a little too sexy for our cameras, so, we retreat to our private interview suite, where couples swing by to let us know what's going on up there.

What happened? Sarah and I commandeered one of the couches and somebody else came over and joined in. You kissed her, then what happened?

The magic happened. You had sex with the other woman and you had sex with the other man? A lot of older people, like, their families are very traditional -- you sleep with one person forever.

But in today's day and age, things are not the way they used to be. For Janel and Steven, the party wasn't exactly what they were hoping for, but the night is still young.

What happens when you get home? Oh, it's on. That's all I can say. Michael and Sarah are more willing to kiss and tell. I really get turned on watching Michael please somebody else.

Because I know how well he pleases me. And I know at the end of the day, like he said, I'm going home with him. There's nothing better than us.

Like, we please each other so well. And today, that's still true. Both couples are still together and say swinging makes their relationships even stronger.

It sounds like you and your husband are well matched in personalities, so you are both willing to cede to the other if the other does something better.

Your rules make sense and are quite logical. You may have said it in another post, but I don't remember: did either you or you husband have other sexual partners before meeting?

I ask because your husband asked what it was like during penetration for your first out of marriage sexual encounter after getting married.

I would think if you had had a lot of partners, it may have been hard to describe in fine detail. I can actually remember the details of giving oral more than I can having intercourse for the most part.

I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience. Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction?

Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia Register! Comment Post Cancel. Originally posted by jns View Post.

Well that's another great story again Natalie, with husband with your swinging life style. That's how you been able to be involved in the life style for so long with these rules you set forth.

Before jumping in head first with thinking of the ramification of living this life style that's really good for you. But my only question if you could do it all over again.

Would you do anything differently at all Natalie, on living in the swinging life style. When out driving always turn left. Then, should you become lost, you can find your way home by reversing the procedure and always turning right.

Originally posted by Natalie View Post. Yes, I had several partners before getting married. My husband was interested in the sex details of this specific time because this was the first time I'd been with another man since we married which gave him quite a sexual high thinking about it.

Interestingly enough, he never really asked about the men except in general terms that I'd had sex with before we met.

He seems only interested in the men I've been with as a married women. Even today my husband gets very excited when I tell him or write it out for him the details of my intimate encounters.

For instance, last night I had my th sexual encounter with a new man. My husband has been gone for a few days on a business trip to Dallas and he knows I hate to sleep alone.

One or two nights is fine but more than that I get very nervous and scared to be alone. I' a fully independent woman but I feel protected when a man sleeps next to me.

As usual when he knows he will be gone for several days like this he suggested I find a "bed mate" for a night or two. Well instead of calling a friend to come over I happened to meet this young, well educated man who was visiting my company from overseas for some training he's an engineer like my husband.

I never intended to "hook up" with him but to make a long story short it worked out perfectly and I was able to have a man in my bed last night and I slept very soundly.

My husband is due back any minute and I of course am going to have to tell him every dirty detail of what happened last night. He never ever gets tired of hearing about my exploiting these "poor young men.

Originally posted by Motorguy View Post. I'd be a little bit more careful on the couples we have chosen but other than that I'd change nothing.

We've had a few nut cases. Is this going to be a series Natalie - how you got from point a to z type thing? Sounds like it'll make for a good read if so and likely help people in similar situations with doubts.

Originally posted by jen View Post. Good read Wouldn't mind hearing about the biggest nut case you've had. How did you convince your husband to do it?

I didn't start out to make this a series but that's a good idea. There has always been so much misconception about swingers and the lifestyle they lead that it's ridicules what some people think.

I live an absolutely normal life and don't advertise my swinging activities at all, though I'm not ashamed of it I know when to be prudent and quiet about such matters.

So yes, I probably will write about some of my experiences. Of the sexual encounters I've had with other men most were very ordinary and vanilla kind of sex.

Those wouldn't make interesting stories as they would all be written like this: "I met John and Jane Doe at the party.

My husband and I liked them. We decided to swap partners. We took them to our home. I had sex with John and my husband with Jane.

We ate a light snack afterwards and talked over wine in the backyard. They went home. The End. I was also a rotten judge of character back then and made some big mistakes.

I've never been raped but there was one time if almost happened and just like in the movies my wonderful, handsome, very strong husband heard my cry, leaped, ran down the hall, burst open the door at the last minute and "took care of business.

Let's just say he was well rewarded later that night. My only regret to this day was that I didn't press charges. Let story telling commence! Natalie Natalie.

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